Better Than Tila?
Who watched the democratic debates last night? Obama tried to be tough, Biden was hilarious as always and Clinton's mouth looked like that on a ventriloquist's dummy.
In case you missed it, here's a quick recap:
Tim Russert (to Clinton): Let's start with you since you are the clear winner. Blah blah blah, Iran?
Clinton: Iran is a terrorist state and I give Bush whatever he wants but I am against war and Iraq was dumb.
Brian Williams: Does my head look lopsided to you?
Obama: I'm glad you asked that because it's time to talk tough. My campaign is about tough talking and Hillary Clinton rushed to war in Iraq.
Russert: Care to rebut that statement and take up some more well deserved air-time?
Clinton: Yes, thank you Tim. Let's be clear, my campaign is about children and jobs. In the face of terror, Iran will be watched closely, but I am adamant in my demands to tell George Bush that I strongly disagree with what I voted for when we talk about Iraq.
Obama: I am tough.
Williams: (To Kucinich) Is it because I am actually always tilting my head to the left or is it just the way I came out of the womb?
Kucinich: Okay, finally you ask me something. When I'm president, I will make all wars illegal, give healthcare to the entire country and assign mandatory unicorns to fly out of everyone's assholes and over cotton candy rainbows.
Russert: Clinton, a rebuttal?
Clinton: Yes, thanks again Tim. You look nice tonight.
Russert: So do you.
Clinton: That is all.
Obama: Now, look. We need to be honest with America. And I'm the guy to tough talk you through it.
Richardson: Saber rattling! Saber rattling!
Williams: It's a birth defect, you know.
Russert: Let's switch this conversation to Social Security.
Dodd: Oh, good. Boring topics are my strong point.
Obama: Hillary's a liar.
Biden: Everyone, shut up. Let's talk about Giuliani. Every word out of this mouth is a verb, a noun and 9/11 (true quote from last night). Let's talk about the real enemies.
Richardson: You're right. I will now go on for five minutes about how great Hillary is because I am hoping to be chosen as vice president.
Russert: We'll be right back.
Williams: Luckily, it's my good side.