Good Monday morning! First things first, if you have an extra $5 or more (or less!), please be a dear and send it to my friend who has been battling cancer for four years? He's doing so damn well but doctor and hospital co-pays really add up. If you don't know him, trust me when I say that he's a super great guy and won't spend it (all) on crack. But seriously, folks, be a giver - it'll make you feel good.
In other news, GOP presidential hopeful and metaphorical chronic hemorrhoid to the Republican party's butt Rick Santorum has recently said that separation between church and state "makes me want to throw up". Yes, Rick Santorum is a teenage girl discovering why things are uncool. He also had this to say about other matters:
"I don't know how we expect our kids to learn when there's like, gum under desks and stuff. Grody!"
On the Economy:
"We need to come together and fix this country, but we need to do it on a Saturday night, all crunk on Four Loko."
"UGH the Chinese Americans TOTALLY have a crush on me and that's so BUSTED!"
On Foreign Policy:
"Has anyone seen the remote? Glee is on and I can't find the fucking remote."
On the Environment:
"I HATE you! You don't UNDERSTAND me!" *door slam*
Yeah, I'm that hardcore. This weekend I will be going to both Atlantic City and Washington DC. DC to see friends of my boyfriend, and AC just because. I seriously need a vacation and I am very much looking forward to this. In the interim, please enjoy this series of photos of cats and dogs hugging.
Open Letter to Rick Santorum Asking What I Can Do To Make My Daddy And Mommy Love Each Other Again and Henceforth Fix The Economy
This morning on MSNBC's Morning Joe, GOP presidential hopeful Rick Santorum talked about what he'd do to improve the economy in this country, and in turn, fix America. I don't have the exact quote from this morning yet, but he seemed to think that instead of investing in our children's education for the future, that it is more important to have heterosexual two parent households. Because that will solve the economy.
I did, however, find a recent quote from Santorum about this matter:
"SANTORUM: If you look at my speech, I mean, I talk about the role that values plays in our economy. I mean, if you look at the strength of the family in America, that's— it's one of the— If you want to snap your finger and change things in America to eliminate poverty, the best way to do it is to go from families where there are two parents in the home as opposed to one. The poverty rate among parents, when there are two parents in the home instead of one is 5 percent with two parents, 30 percent with one.
So, should we have policies that encourage fathers to take responsibility for their children, that nurtures and actually supports people in relationships so they— so they can not have children out of wedlock, or help them through a difficult situation with respect to divorce. ... You know, we have a president out there talking about obesity. Yeah, obesity's a problem, but family stability and strong marriages and families and reducing the out-of-wedlock birthrate, you want to turn this economy around that will do that as much as any tax plan or spending plan."
- Interview with Megyn Kelly at Fox News, October 2011
You can also watch it here:
Darn, I had no idea that my broken family was assisting in the downfall of this country. Honestly, I feel terrible. We're worse than the terrorists. So what to do? If I get my family back together, will America have a shot? I can't risk not trying - the situation is dire. But I might need some help. And what better person to ask than Rick Santorum? I hope that, like Jesus, he'll answer my prayers cuz I sure could use some guidance! So with that, here's my Open Letter to Rick Santorum Asking What I Can Do To Make My Daddy And Mommy Love Each Other Again and Henceforth Fix The Economy.
Dear Mr. Santorum,
We don't have a lot of time, so I'll make it brief. Recently you said, "Family stability and strong marriages and families and reducing the out-of-wedlock birthrate, you want to turn this economy around that will do that as much as any tax plan or spending plan."
First of all, I am so sorry that I was a part of a family whose dynamic is, as we speak, promoting civil and economic unrest. I would like to apologize on the behalf of my single mother, single mother sister, myself, and my abusive father who doesn't love me. We would like to extend our sincerest condolences for what has happened to the US economy.
My question to you is this: what can I do about it before the economy gets any worse? Unemployment is still very high, and that scares me. I understand funding is now being cut from many programs including Pell grants for students, Planned Parenthood and that pesky EPA, but surely there's a way to do more.
Plainly speaking, Mr. Santorum, if the future of our economy rests on two parent heterosexual families as you have said, can you get my broken family back together?
Listen, don't think I tried. When I was ten and my mommy and daddy were fighting endlessly, my mother would cry all the time. I know now those were tears of America's future, not the impending fears of raising two children alone while putting herself through school. When my father was emotionally abusive to us, I really, really did hope, as I choked in my silent tears at night so as not to bother anyone with my crying, that when my daddy said he didn't love me anymore that it would somehow not affect the S&P. And when my father finally did leave, never to speak to us again, and we slowly picked up the pieces and started to smile again, I now get that by taking painful steps to rebuild my life, I was actually helping to tear down automobile plants, thus causing corporations to outsource American jobs to China and Mexico. For that I am sorry.
So, Mr. Santorum, please, can you get my daddy back, and convince my mom to forgive him for being such an asshole? If that's the only way to help America, gosh darn it, I'll do my part. I'll get all my other heathen friends from broken homes to do the same. Together, we CAN make a difference. Thank you, Mr. Santorum, for believing what is important and true in America.