Good Monday morning! First things first, if you have an extra $5 or more (or less!), please be a dear and send it to my friend who has been battling cancer for four years? He's doing so damn well but doctor and hospital co-pays really add up. If you don't know him, trust me when I say that he's a super great guy and won't spend it (all) on crack. But seriously, folks, be a giver - it'll make you feel good.
In other news, GOP presidential hopeful and metaphorical chronic hemorrhoid to the Republican party's butt Rick Santorum has recently said that separation between church and state "makes me want to throw up". Yes, Rick Santorum is a teenage girl discovering why things are uncool. He also had this to say about other matters:
"I don't know how we expect our kids to learn when there's like, gum under desks and stuff. Grody!"
On the Economy:
"We need to come together and fix this country, but we need to do it on a Saturday night, all crunk on Four Loko."
"UGH the Chinese Americans TOTALLY have a crush on me and that's so BUSTED!"
On Foreign Policy:
"Has anyone seen the remote? Glee is on and I can't find the fucking remote."
On the Environment:
"I HATE you! You don't UNDERSTAND me!" *door slam*