Animal Love

I finally got my ASPCA membership starter pack yesterday. It came with an orange Lance Armstrong-like bracelet that said "Petstrong" or something like that, an oversized XXXXXXXL shirt with some logo, and a photo of the dog I am sponsoring. He is a young retriever mix named Rusty.

Now as most of you know, I joined after seeing that freaking commercial with Sarah McLachlan and the one-eyed animals over and over again. Please- take my monthly $18 and buy that critter an eye patch.

So just when I thought that's all I received, (and don't get me wrong, I'm glad I'm sponsoring an animal), there was a knock at my door.

It was Sarah McLachlan.

Before I could even speak she gingerly put one finger on my lips and said, "Shhhhhhhh..." as she let herself in. She then turned around and began singing "Angel" acapella. It was so beautiful and I cried. We hugged and then she thanked me for being a sponsor. It was worth the 3 month wait. Thank you, ASPCA and thank you, Sarah McLachlan.

But then she turned to my dog, took his sweet face in her hands, and started singing her sexually charged hit, "Posession" and then it got... really weird, and Jesse looked really uncomfortable so I kicked the freaky bitch out.