From an email conversation I'm having right now:
Friend 1: Hey gang, I have two extra seats at a table at the Sesame Street benefit next Wednesday night. Anyone free and want to join us? Program: Hosted by Robin Roberts and Elmo, Honoring Joe and Jill Biden, John Legend performing
Me: I'm in!
Friend 2: Me too!
Friend 1: Looks like you guys are my hot lesbian couple!
Friend 2: We will be the female Bert and Ernie.
Me: Who has the unibrow? I don't want to be that one. But I will if you don't.
Friend 2: Unibrow is Bert. I'll be him because he is a beanpole.
Me: So I'm the butch one. That's okay.
Friend 2: No Ernie is the woman. He's a softy. Bert is the bitchy one
Me: No, Bert is the bitchy one, so he's the woman.
Friend 2: Ernie is emotionally available. Bert isn't.
Me: Good point.