Wit and Mitt
It is a quiet afternoon at a Walmart in Washington, DC. Barack Obama is lazily pushing a cart, absentmindedly browsing the array of detergents when a familiar person sidles up next to him.
Romney: 'Sup Barry
Obama: Oh, hey.
Romney: Can I ask you a favor?
Romney: Can I borrow a dollar?
Romney: A dollar. Can you spot me a Washington?
Obama: Um, I guess... (hands him a dollar)
Romney: Thanks. There's a special on Pixie Stix, 2 for $0.99.
Obama: That sounds nice.
Romney: I mean, two for the price of one. It's like being a Mormon! Get it? Two wives?
Obama: I have never made light of your religion, Mitt. Now if you'll excuse me, Michelle needs me to get some paper towels.
Romney: You know what WE have Barry?
Obama: No, please don't make me.
Romney: Go on. Guess. (Nudges his head towards aisle 3)
Obama: Ladies undergarments?
Romney: But they're MAGIC.
Obama: Oh, come on, I'm tired of hearing you make jokes about your own religion! You are such a self hating Mormon! Now if you'll let me continue shopping, I have a very busy day.
Romney: Ok. Just answer me one more thing.
Obama: UGH ok WHAT?
Romney: (holding up a neon jumpsuit) Does this jumpsuit make me look like I didn't acknowledge black people until 1978?
Obama: No, it makes you look fat.
Romney: R...really? (lowers the jumpsuit). I was just teasing is all. Having a little fun. Having a laugh - a chortle.
Obama: Well, you need to stop these shenanigans and start taking this campaign seriously.
Romney: I guess you're right.
Romney: I heard that.