But Think Of The Puppy

This morning I had a mission at the Apple store: to get my iPhone screen fixed, and get it fixed for free. Yeah, yeah, I know it's not that expensive to replace the screen but I've heard stories of pretty girls who show their cleavage getting it done for free "just this once". So I put on one of my favorite dresses, kicked the make-up up a notch and went on my way.

I was greeted by a very nice young woman who asked me what was wrong. I was hoping for a tech geek nerd guy but this woman had a LesBeFriends vibe about her, so I knew I'd be okay. I can lay it on real thick for the ladies, about as thick as the eyeliner ONLY ON THE BOTTOM PART OF HER EYE this woman was sporting. Telltale sign a gal bats for the same team, FYI. Fun fact, it's also a great way to tell if a guy is into emo music. Anyway, I give her my sob story.

Her: Oh dear, what happened?

Me: I... I was chasing after my friend's puppy (it actually got knocked off my boyfriend's backyard table but whatever).

Her: Oh no. If only we could replace the screen.

Me: Yeah... if on... wait, what?

So apparently with the NEW phones you have to replace the whole phone, not just the screen. Goddamn Apple. But I could get a very discounted rate, you know, because of the puppy, so I'll just end up doing that. I would have done it today but all those pictures I take of said cleavage aren't backed up. Details.