The Pipes

Joe "The Plumber" Wurzelbacher is now being quoted as saying that he was "appalled" and "felt dirty" after being on John McCain's campaign trail.

According to Wurzelbacher, "I honestly felt even more dirty after I had been on the campaign trail and seen some things that take place. It was scary, man. You know, I was angry. In fact, I wanted to get off the bus after I talked to him. [He touched my privates and told me that if] I [told anyone that he would kill my parents] was really pissed."

According to the same interview, "Asked why he didn't leave McCain's campaign if he was 'appalled' by the candidate, Wurzelbacher said, 'Honestly, because the thought of Barack Obama as president scares me even more [because I am a giant douche] you know?'"