Politically Corrective

Transcript from John McCain's speech to the NAACP Convention:

"Hello everyone, and thank you for having me at your convention.

(APPLAUSE)

Thank you. Thank you. Let me begin, if I may, with a few words about my opponent. Don't tell him I said this, but he's an impressive fellow in many ways.

(APPLAUSE)

He's inspired a great many Americans, some of whom have wrongly believed that a political campaign could hold no purpose or meaning for them. This success should make Americans, all Americans, proud. And I'll admit at first I was afraid of him!

(LAUGHTER)

And not just because he's black!

(SILENCE)

You know... because he's a great candidate. Uh, a few years before the NAACP was founded, President Theodore Roosevelt's invitation of Booker T. Washington to dine at the White House was taken as an outrage and an insult in many quarters. America today is a world away from the cruel and prideful bigotry of that time. There's no better evidence of this than the nomination of an African-American to be the presidential nominee of his party.

(APPLAUSE)

And I mean, you can't get any blacker than Obama!

(SILENCE. PIN DROP)

He's the real deal. Real black, African black. Dark like the... jungles of Vietnam at night. Where I was a prisoner for 5 years. I served my country proudly in Vietnam, and I made it back alive.

(A COUGH)

Um, so I'd like to give praise for all Senator Obama's done for the black community.

(APPLAUSE)

But watch out, cuz McCain's in town!

(LIGHT APPLAUSE)

And I'm going to run a good campaign. A fair campaign. With dignity and respect for my opponent.

(APPLAUSE)

That won't stop me from locking my car doors when I roll through his neighborhood!

(SILENCE)

You know, because those supporters of his might ask me for money!

(DEAD SILENCE)

For his campaign... and I, uh I mean, I wouldn't give it because... I'm running against him. Oh, Jeez."