It's Not TV. It's Really F@#ked Up TV.

Okay everyone, settle down. I know you are all excited for the FOX drama "New Amsterdam". I know you all had to wait because test audiences hated it. I can't see why- I mean, the plot is pretty simple. So there's a guy who was a Dutch soldier in the 1700's and he saved the life of this Native American woman so she granted him eternal life. While she had the power of time and space and didn't use it to save her people from getting wiped out by the white man I'll never know, but anyway, this guy is immortal.

So wait, it gets better. He lives in New York circa 2008 and is an NYPD homicide detective. The only way he can turn turn mortal again is if he finds true love. Oh, and he's a recovering alcoholic. So many reasons to watch!